Dobsonflies and Statement Pieces

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Letting my dog out for her morning small business development, I noticed something large and buggy moving around in the grass near the pup’s favorite spot. It was big, had it’s tusks and antennae tangled up in the grass, and was no less than 4-5 inches long.  Yeah verily it was another Dobsonfly – a bug I was never aware of until a couple years ago when one crashed an evening BBQ, and sent the whole group of us into hiding, or lacrosse stick swinging terror!  I live close enough to the Chesapeake Bay, and Baltimore Harbor apparently to attract these love struck creepos in their brief winged adult stage as they search for mates.  Lucky me!

I won’t lie, I find Dobsonflies fascinating when they, like this one, are stuck on something and incapable of charging at me.  Should this one have flown at me I am fairly certain people would have been able to hear the squeal through their internet connection whether they read GG or not.  This male was probably on it’s last legs, since they only live a week after they gain flight.  It definitely had enough spit and vinegar left in it to lean back and clack it’s tusk-y mandibles at my dog when she leaned over it, play bowed, and kicked it, in the hopes of a good game of chase. Luckily at the time it didn’t choose to nail me with foul smelling spray it can shoot out it’s back end when it feels threatened.  Anything like that would have nailed me right in the chops, and I have no idea where to look on the internet for a “how to” article on safely cleaning anal spray out of the nooks and crannies of your husband’s Nikon camera.

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It would be hard to explain to him later for sure.  Something else I have to imagine that is hard to explain to your husband is this!  The same morning I discovered the Dobsonfly, I decided to check out Yahoo’s photo gallery from Ladies Day at the Ascot horse race in England, and found THIS hat parading around!  What is THAT!

photo 1308266047947 1 0 Dobsonflies and Statement PiecesPhoto Credit: Carl de Souza, and Yahoo News

This is why I will never be rich.  Not because I would refuse to don such a creation, but because I will never be the kind of out-of-the-box creature who thinks of bedazzling giant faux Dobsonflies, nestling them on top of high fashion haberdashery, and selling them for big bucks to ladies of culture.

Why God.  Just why.